Monday, June 1, 2009

Babywise or Not-So-Wise?

This is the question. I am reading "On Becoming Babywise". Has anyone else read this? Its all about feeding and sleeping schedules basically. It seems great and so practical but it makes me feel like I am not so good at this mom stuff sometimes! I just don't feel capable of leaving Noah screaming in his crib until he falls asleep while he is so little. I also tried "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" (Kerry's recommendation!) and liked it but thought it wasn't a really easy read, a bit hard to follow or something.

What's the consensus?

7 comments:

Alli said...

I've never actually read babywise, so I don't know exactly what it says, but I did read quite a few things that said to wait until about five months to try true "crying it out." That's about when we started it with the twins, & they seemed old enough at that point to "get" it. Call me if you need some moral support!

Tina said...

I agree....I would wait until he is between 5-6 months old before letting him cry it out. And remember, if your gut doesn't feel right about it, then it's not the right solution to your problem. Just because it says in a book doesn't mean its written gold. Do what your mom gut feels you, that will be best for both of you :) if momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!

Jessica said...

Hi, I just ran across this post - don't let Babywise make you feel inadequate - the AAP has actually issued a warning about that book. Here's a great article discussing it: http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/1998/08/cov_06feature2.html

Just follow your instincts and enjoy this time - they are only tiny once!

Colored With Memories said...

hey there...ya, healthy sleep habits is more of a handbook...just read a couple of chapters that seem applicable. we didn't do baby wise all the way...balanced it against the other book. follow your gut...you know little noah better than any of us. i think we started letting ours cry it out by 3 months...i know that was the point that they started sleeping 12 hours straight w/no snacking/waking. it will happen...a little bit of heaven awaits you!

Chris and Carolee said...

Everyone that has read baby wise hates it or loves it. I think it depends on your personality. I read some of it and agree with colored Memories balance it. First I found with my baby that I did not start seeing a consistent schedule until she was about 2 1/2 to 3 months old. We have always been very routined. We do the same thing everyday. A lot of moms do not like schedules because it means they are confined to the house for the first few months making sure that they are doing naps, feedings, ect.. at the same time every day. It works for me and I like it. The older they get the easier it is for Caroline to be flexible with her schedule. Caroline is nearly a year old and I have never had to let her cry it out because I feel like she just knows the routine. This is what we do bath, lotion, PJ, bottle (in her room with just a lamp on) and the we put her in bed, music on, paci and then we say prayers, tell her good night and she goes to sleep. For naps time, I just started watching for cues to when she was sleepy and it was at the same time everyday so I would put her down with music ( different music then her night time music) and she would sleep. Chris and I discussed it and we were not going to let her cry it out until she was 6 months old so when she was younger then 6 mo if she would cry when we put her down I would go in and comfort her, I would try not to pick her up sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn’t and when it didn’t I would rock her. This got a lot less frequent the more she got use to the routine.
Get ready…
As soon as you get use to a schedule it will change. Noah will hit a growth spurt and eat more and this will throw off the schedule or he will get sick or cut teeth and this will mess it up. I have had to learn to be very flexible and to adjust when something was not working. I do not like baby wise teaches flexibility or that babies are all different. Some days are great and some aren’t but, treasure every moment good or bad because it goes by so fast.

**Do not let a book or anyone make you feel inadequate. As social worker we have seen inadequate and abusive parents. You love Noah and take good care of him so you are already a great parent. Every baby is different you do what works for you. Call me when you feel inadequate and I will social work you. Social Work forever!!!!!!!!

Elle said...

I didn't read any books...NONE, when Donnia was born. She's 16 and has turned out just fine. Go with your instincts and what you can live with. We don't need any books telling us how to feel inadequate, cause Mommy guilt is so bad all by itself.

Ash said...

I saw this post from a Google Alert and just had to give you my opinion.

The only qualification that the authors of Babywise have to write a parenting book is the fact that they have children. Neither of the Ezzos have any background in child psychology, medicine, sociology, education or any other field that might make them any authority on child rearing.

I have read the book and hated it. It justifies letting TINY babies cry it out. Honestly, I hate it so much that I saw a copy at a yard sale and bought so I could destroy it and keep that copy out of the hands of a parent who didn't have the confidence to make their own parenting decisions and would actually follow what that evil book told them too.

I hope your little boy is happy and healthy. Enjoy parenting!